The Way I Are

I love to DO!
I mean, I love to do things; all kinds of things:
Baking
Cooking
Reading
Dancing
Eating
Writing
and so on....!

There are so many things that I love to do that I don't get to finish any.

Not the best life, I suppose.

I started to love decorating cakes.
Bought all the stuff for it and watched all these shows and YouTube videos on tips and whatever.
Lasted about two weeks.

Then I fell in love with writing.
I have three books in the making!

Then I fell in love with playing piano (still love it!)
I know all the keys' locations and how to play chords.
Then I stopped playing it.

Safe to say, that I love falling in love with all kinds of hobbies and have many different passions.
The one things that I do not like (or love)
Is never finishing.

You see, I WANT to finish something, to say that I am (almost) a pro at something.
But I just move on to something different.

This can be scary for someone who comes up with ridiculous scenarios in their head:
*On a date (for example)*
He- "So what is something you like to do or are good at?"
Me- *Heavily breathing as my eyes widen in panic* "I am pro at knowing random facts that I don't know are true"

Yeah, I thought that out completely.
There is no second date there >.<

Of course, this is not somethign that will happen, I just come up with these randomly about once or twice a month.

So I like to do many things. BIG DEAL!
After suffering with "worst-case" here I am
The way I are:
Completely Happy to say that I have done or tried many things.
Not exciting things.... but MY things.

My newest craze: Cookie decorating.

:D

I just...love this.

There are going to be things that I never give up.
I still love to read books.
I still love to take pictures just for the fun of it.
I still make Pinterest boards for things I may never do but love to dream about.

There is nothing wrong with dreaming.

If I didn't dream, I would be in a really bad place right now.

God is SO GOOD!
He made me!
Every fine detail about me- physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually..etc.

I no longer have to worry about what I want to do.
I have the option to start one thing and start another.
He GAVE ME that option.

I can just be.
I don't need to be freaking out about what to do or worry about anything related to that.
He has a plan. I will be where I need to be.
It makes me think of Esther.

But that is for another time.

Pray. Love. Be.
We were created to worship and honor Him
We can focus on the petty or unnecessary details but that will just take us away from His purpose.

I will do that.
That is my homework for myself.
Pray. Love. Be.

Anything that doesn't make me happy can wait in the background.
No need to worry.
Life will be rocky and it will hurt sometimes but with the Creator on my side, there is no need to stress.

Just Pray. Love. Be- With Faith.
He's Got the Wheel. <3

The Truth Will Set You Free

I will admit to hard times with my studies this semester. And if you all knew me, you would know that admitting this is one of the hardest things for me to do.

The only thing harder than that was telling my parents.

I have always held my education on the highest of highest pedestals in my life.
I did excellent in elementary, middle school, and high school. Especially high school- I was all about my grades. (B's would make me cry!)

So when the college education started i was nervous but did good. I received my Associates from Northland Community and Technical College. Following that, I began at UND.

I began the semester with high spirits to only be brought down. And when my mood and motivation went down, I began to keep it a secret from my family.
They would ask me how school was going and I would respond with one of three answers:
-It was great, did a lot today.
-It was fine, the professor (continues with story)
-Eh. it was okay, I guess I am just tired.

The more days would pass, the less and less confidence I would have in myself and in my future.
I kept thinking of scenarios of my failure and what I was going to do with my life.

That was until I spoke to my parents.

It wasn't intentional. I wasn't ever going to tell them. Until the day of an exam. I was so tired and beaten that I could no longer control what I was doing. I was literally leaning against the wall and could not move, almost shaking from this heaviness.
The tears welled up in my eyes and i just blurted out my "dark" secret.
And I cried. (I'm a crier so nothing new but this one felt different)

I was so scared of their disappointment. I was scared of saying it out loud because then it would be real to me.

And you know what they said then?

Words of encouragement, of love, of trust, of reassurance.
They said they would never be disappointed in me.
They said that if something goes wrong, then there will be other chances, other opportunities and I can just continue to go to school, i could even change my major again (something funny and heartwarming to say after doing so 3 times).

And we prayed together. It was then that I felt the "freeing" feeling.
My heart, at first, felt like it was splitting in two. Then it started to hurt even more. And finally, there was peace.
Peace all around me.
Filling me from my feet to the top of my head.
It was a fuzzy feeling.
I had never felt so alive.

A few days after praying with my dad, I had an exam.
I was nervous, of course, (tests make me nervous) and I went ahead, studied and started.
After the test, I went home and took a nap.
Surprisingly, I woke up refreshed.

Boring right? A nap? but let me tell you, I never  take naps and when I did the last time (months ago, maybe?) I just feel sick.
and Yesterday? I received my grade and couldn't be happier!!!

And for the second time (first after the prayer), I could not have felt more excited for the school work! My workload seems light to me now and I feel like I have all the time in the world.

This made me realize something that I was always told and what I always tell others:
When you have a problem, Talk to God first!!! His words will set you free!!!!!!!

I don't know how many times I was told these things and I just did't listen, Until now.

So my advice to you all:
Talk to God. Listen to God. Continue to be in a relationship with God. And you will feel incredibly joyful and free! Don't be afraid to tell the truth.
You will sing loud in the car even when the windows are open and people give you strange looks.
Feel happy and live happily with God by your side!

Simple?
It is.

God Bless!!!!